This past month has been a struggle in adjusting, but my
feelings about being here are growing to be more positive and the desire to
flee home has more or less dissipated, at least until now. A wise friend
reminded me that home is always ready and waiting for me when I return. Hearing
this has made it easier for me focus on being present here, rather than
dreaming and wondering what’s going on in all the places other than here. But the
world still spins, time still turns, and home is going to change. When I was
preparing to leave to come here, I would silently pray that everyone would
still be here (there) when I got back.
How does one practice being present when home is hurting? I
feel so called to be somewhere else, feel so called to be home (which has come
to mean far more than a single place, a single person). And I would go,
instantly, without hesitation, if it weren’t for the cost to fly (if only I
could Apparate…). Know that although physically I am here, miles and miles away,
mentally and emotionally I am reaching for you, that I am with you. I love you
so much.
Go like water, come like water.
