In my last post I
talked about choosing a site for my two years of service, and since then I have
chosen a site. Unfortunately because of the time crunch, Todd and I were only
able to visit Nebaj, which is where I am now. Along with BVS, I am working with
a Guatemalan organization called CIEDG, which stands for Conferencia de
Iglesias Evangelicas D..? Guatemala, or Church Conferences of Guatemala. CIEDG
works on a local scale, giving presentations on the basics of business, women’s
rights, importance of hygiene, among other things. CIEDG has also provided
greenhouse plastic (and sometimes the wood or PVS for the building structure)
for several groups of families here in Nebaj as well as the surrounding aldeas (towns outside of a city). When I
visited Nebaj the first time, I got to know who is now my host mother, as well
as her immediate and extended family. While originally I was hesitant to agree
to come here, once I found out that I would stay with Cata, I felt a lot more
excited about being part of this community.
As a result of the
civil war (which I will talk about later, after I learn enough to say
something), many of the Ixil people were either killed or displaced and are now
living in unfamiliar places, where they do not always know how to grow food.
This is one reason for the greenhouses. The greenhouses serve as another source
of food or income, if there is excess, during the winter months here. While a
Guatemalan winter is not the same as a winter in Indiana, it is still difficult
to grow food during this time. During my first time in Nebaj, it rained every
day except the last and for the week I was there, there were four days without
sun (The weather definitely contributed to my hesitation to stay here. I am
definitely sensitive to ‘winter blues’).
Now that I am here and
it has stopped raining, I am growing to like it. I live in one of the aldeas
called Visajcub (vee-sa-coobp). It is about a 15-30 minute walk from the town
depending on if you are camindando or
paseando. It is beautiful here, and
there are three green houses on Cata’s family’s property (she only participates
in caring for one of them). While I am happy to be here, it has also been a
struggle, even in these few days. I never really felt called to be here in
Nebaj, and I may have misread a ‘sign’ to even come to Guatemala. Although I am
still in Guatemala, Nebaj has a different set of cultural norms than
Ixtahuacan, which I am still figuring out. In terms of gender norms, Guatemala
is rather traditional, which has been frustrating for me, as I tend to be a
little more masculine (especially in the way I dress). Here, appearance is
incredibly important. People have outfits specifically for going into town, and
most people are keen on looking sharp. I did not bring dress shoes nor sandals,
and my baggy jeans are a sight sore, but it is what I like. It is difficult
wanting to fit in, but at the same time being (at my core), radically different
from this culture.
I have also been
struggling (again) with language. I’m not sure if there is a different dialect
here, but I’ve been having trouble understanding people, as well as expressing
myself. I find myself dreaming of going home, what I will do once BVS is over,
and even catch myself looking at other BVS sites as though I would change. I am
determined, at this time, to stay here for at least six months. If it hasn’t
changed, then I will work on an alternative plan. I need to be more proactive
and participatory until then…
Adios.
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